Remembering Rose (Mapleby Memories Book 1) Read online

  For a start, Ella was back in touch. Instead of texting me, she had called early one morning while I was clearing up the stewed apple and yoghurt Leah had managed to smear across her highchair. My shriek of delight probably blasted her eardrum but she didn’t complain, and by the time we had finished talking she had agreed to come to Mapleby to see her Dad. I could tell she felt guilty for leaving it so long, the same as I could tell there was something going on in her life that she didn’t want to talk about. I had a feeling the two were intertwined but I didn’t ask. I didn’t mention Robbie either because I wasn’t sure what her reaction would be, so to keep things fair I didn’t tell him she was coming either.

  Ella sorted, I now had to talk to Millie. It took a lot of courage to walk into the shop and face her again, and I certainly didn’t deserve the warm greeting she gave me. For a moment I was speechless, then I turned to Daniel.

  “Is it okay if Millie and I go upstairs for a coffee?”

  “Be my guests,” he said. “I’ll call for help in the unlikely event that we get inundated with customers.”

  Millie laughed and I poked my tongue out. It was two o’clock in the afternoon, too early for the school run and way past the time people dropped by for a sandwich or something from the deli. It was the middle of the week too, so not the day most people did their grocery shopping.

  Hefting Leah onto my hip, I followed Millie up the wooden stairs at the back of the storeroom. They were covered with splashes of white paint. “Is Robbie going to sand these down?” I asked her.

  She looked at the paint as if she had never noticed it before. “I don’t know. I haven’t asked him.”

  Her tone of voice told me everything I needed to know and I could have kicked myself. Of course she hadn’t noticed a few blobs of paint on the stairs, she was too intent on getting a roof over her head, somewhere dry and safe for her children. I had a sudden picture of Leah and me with nowhere to go and no close family to turn to and felt ashamed that I had ever given her a hard time.

  “It’s not important,” I said. “I’ll ask him to do it when I next see him.”

  “Thank you. You see him most days don’t you, now he’s renovating the house next to yours.”

  Wondering if that piece of information had come from Robbie or Daniel, or someone else entirely, and not liking the fact that our daily coffee break seemed to be common knowledge, I just nodded. Then I asked her if I could look round the apartment. She stared at me in surprise.

  “It’s yours, Rachel, you don’t have to ask to look at it.”

  “Yes I do, because it’s going to be your home so for all I know you’ve already started putting up curtains and things.”

  I was trying to be nice, to make up for all the mean thoughts I’d had about her, I wasn’t trying to make her cry. I did though. Great gulping sobs that smeared her mascara and made her nose run. I dug into my bag for a tissue and came up with some of Leah’s baby wipes. When she saw them, Millie gave a shaky laugh.

  “They’ll do a much better job than a tissue,” she said, taking one and wiping all her make-up away.

  Seeing her with a shiny nose and freckles did wonders for my confidence even though I was long past wondering if Daniel was tempted by her. She saw the expression on my face and managed another smile. “It’s all camouflage. Underneath I’m a total mess.”

  Deciding the tour of the apartment could wait, I led her into the kitchen and made her sit down. Then I plopped Leah on her lap while I made the coffee. Unlike the last time they’d met, Leah was full of smiles. She also found Millie’s long red ponytail a source of fascination and proceeded to pull it hard.

  “Ouch! That hurts, sweetie,” Millie distracted her by bouncing her up and down while she sang a nursery rhyme. I watched them while I waited for the kettle to boil and saw that she genuinely liked children. She was a more natural mother than me, someone who would always cope in an emergency. Leah would not only be safe with her, she would enjoy the extra attention.

  I finished making the coffee and put it on the table in front of her, just out of Leah’s reach. “Do you want me to take over now?” I asked.

  “Not unless you want to. It’s a long time since I cuddled such a little one. I love that special baby smell they have.” She suddenly looked wistful. “Much as I love my boys, I always wanted a little girl.”

  “Well now you can have one for three hours, five days a week,” I said.

  “Are you really sure about that, Rachel? It sounded a good idea when Daniel told me he thought you were bored staying at home all the time, but afterwards, when I had time to think about it, I wondered if it was how you really felt, or if Daniel was misreading things. Believe me, men do that sometimes,” she added bitterly.

  Her concern was enough for me to forget how angry I’d been that she and Daniel had been discussing me behind my back. It was enough, too, for me to suggest to her the idea that had been niggling away at the back of my mind ever since Leah had pulled her hair.

  “I’m quite sure,” I said firmly. “Besides she’ll only be upstairs when I’m working in the shop so you can always call me if she needs me. And there’s something else I’d like you to consider too. What about us doing alternate Saturdays as well? We can share the children between us.”

  She stared at me. “Would you really do that, have the boys I mean?”

  “Well, I’d have to get to know them first so maybe we should try half a day at the beginning, but yes I’m happy to give it a try. Daniel says they are very nice little boys, well behaved and polite.”

  She smiled then. “I’ve threatened them to ever be anything else but good when they are in the shop. They’re okay though, which is a miracle given everything they’ve been through in their short lives.”

  I didn’t want to pry so I just agreed but she was determined to get everything out in the open. “In case you’re wondering, they never see their father. He lives in Spain now, with a girl who is almost young enough to be his daughter. I wish her the best of luck with him if she ever wants children.”

  She saw the question in my eyes even though I tried to hide it, and her mouth twisted into a painful smile. “He was fine until Liam was born but once the excitement of being a new dad was over, the responsibility began to pall. Because I’d read all the books I knew fathers could sometimes be jealous in the early days, so I gave him as much attention as I could and waited for him to get over it. He didn’t though and then we fell for Connor. I didn’t intend to have another baby so soon, but because I love children it didn’t really bother me. It bothered him though, so much so that he hit me.”

  She stopped then, one hand over her mouth while the other clutched Leah. “I’ve never told anyone that before. I’m sorry. I’ll understand if you don’t want me to look after Leah now you know I couldn’t even keep my own family safe.”

  I stopped her. “Please, Millie don’t say another thing. If we start swapping confidences there are plenty of things I could tell you that I’m ashamed of, and maybe I will one day. In the meantime, you still have to show me around your new home.”

  * * *

  By the time we rejoined Daniel, Millie and I were close to being friends. We walked to the school together when it was time for her to collect her little boys, and when they came running out and saw Leah in her pram they begged to be allowed to push her. I expected them to argue when Millie said no, but they didn’t. Instead they walked either side of me and talked to Leah. Impressed, I asked them about their day and learned it was bug week.

  “They mean National Insect Week,” Millie told me, laughing at my confusion. “Almost every lesson has a bug connection. They’ve been writing about them, drawing them, counting their legs, and putting them in glass jars so they can examine them. “

  “’Cept my teacher makes us set them all free at the end of every day,” Connor told me indignantly.

  I smiled at him. “I don’t think they’d enjoy living in school all the time, do you?”

  He lo
oked doubtful. “I don’t think they’d mind spending a week there, or I could bring them home and they could live with me.”

  His brother, barely a year older, shook his head scathingly. “You know we’re not allowed to have pets where we live, and we won’t be able to have them when we move, either. You can’t keep bugs in a shop, they might get in the food.”

  In for a penny, in for a pound. “You can come and look at the bugs in my garden anytime you like,” I said.

  “Really and truly?” Connor’s face lit up with excitement.

  Thinking of all the greenfly, ants and ladybirds that populated my garden, to say nothing of the beetles, centipedes and spiders, I nodded. “How about you come on Saturday while your Mummy is moving into your new home?”

  * * *

  Of course I forgot the Trayners were arriving on Saturday when I made my impetuous offer, the same as I forgot about Ella. It was only when Robbie arrived the following morning and helped me finish the last of the choc chip cookies that I remembered. I groaned.

  “What’s the problem?” he asked, wiping crumbs from his mouth with the back of his hand. Even though I was right back on Daniel, I couldn’t help noticing that he had a beautiful mouth, sculpted but firm, and set above a cleft chin that made his otherwise very handsome face slightly quirky. For a moment I was ashamed of my thoughts but then I realized that looking is very different from wanting, and I went back to enjoying the view even as I explained what I’d done.

  “They’ll be looking forward to a quiet visit while they make final decisions on the décor for the house, and instead the next door garden will be full of small boys collecting bugs and shouting at the top of their voices.”

  He laughed out loud at that. “You do love to exaggerate, don’t you? Two small boys aren’t exactly overkill and besides all you have to do is tell them the bugs will hide from them if they make too much noise and your non-existent problem is settled.”

  “Do you always have an answer for everything?”

  “If only,” he gave me a dark look before finishing his coffee in a single gulp and going back to his building. As I watched him walk down the path I remembered Ella and wondered if I would ever learn to think before I spoke.

  * * *

  Saturday dawned bright and clear, like most days that summer. I was up and dressed by six o’clock much to Daniel’s amusement. “Anyone who didn’t know better would think it was you who was moving, not Millie.”

  I handed him a mug of coffee. “At least you’re getting coffee in bed and that doesn’t happen very often, so be grateful.”

  He grinned at me, well it was more of a leer actually. “I can think of something I’d much rather have.”

  “In your dreams, mister. This is Millie’s day so I’m going to make a cake to welcome her to her new home, and a casserole too, so she doesn’t need to cook this evening. You can give her sandwiches from the shop at lunchtime.”

  “Yes, Ma’am,” he sketched a salute. “Are there any more orders, Ma’am?”

  I threw a balled up sock at him. “Yes. You can get Leah when she wakes up.”

  * * *

  Rose was waiting for me in the kitchen, which sort of surprised me. Now I knew all her secrets I expected her to leave me alone. “I’m not going to tell anyone about you,” I said, as I reached for the mixing bowl.

  She smiled but she didn’t go. She just sat there, on one of the kitchen chairs, and watched me as I beat butter and sugar together, added the eggs and flour, and spooned the mixture into a cake tin. At first I was irritated but then I calmed down, and by the time I put the cake in the cooker I felt positively mellow.

  I glanced at Rose and she smiled again. Had she turned up to keep me calm, or had she come to see the Trayners? Then the truth hit me as clearly as if I’d heard her speak. She was here for Robbie. He might not be her own flesh and blood but he was linked to her precious son through his great-great-grandfather, the original Robert Parker, so she wasn’t going until she had sorted out his life as well as mine.

  I shook my head. “You’re a witch, not a ghost, Rose Davis. I just hope you are as successful with Robbie as you were with me, then perhaps we can all have a bit of peace.”

  “Are you practicing your welcome speech for the Trayners?” Daniel teased as he came through to the kitchen with Leah.

  I banged a few pans about so I could pretend I hadn’t heard him but he knew I had and I heard him chuckling as he carried Leah out into the garden to greet the morning.

  “You certainly know how to complicate my life,” I told Rose, turning back to where she was sitting, but of course she had gone.

  When Daniel came back indoors, leaving wet footprints all over the floor because of the dew on the grass, I was chopping vegetables while meat and spices browned in a pan on the hob. He sniffed appreciatively. “I hope you’re making two of those.”

  I gave him my best beady stare. “I’m making one large one and we are all going to eat it at Millie’s.”

  His eyes widened in surprise. “Does she know?”

  “She does. We arranged it yesterday. You can collect me and the children when the shop closes, and if Ella has arrived by then, she can come too.”

  “Well put the flags out, Ella’s coming to Mapleby. Come on, Rachel, you don’t really believe that do you, not after she’s let everyone down so many times? Besides, Tom hasn’t said a thing and he’d tell anyone who would listen if she really was coming.”

  “He hasn’t said a thing because he doesn’t know,” I told him. “I talked to her on the phone and told her how he’s not coping so well these days and that’s when she said she’d come.”

  “But you daren’t tell him in case she bails out again,” he said, and then went into the bathroom whistling.

  He was right of course, but I wasn’t going to admit to it. I had to believe she was coming because if she let me down, I didn’t have a back up plan for Robbie.

  Chapter Eighteen

  The next day I couldn’t remember why I’d been so worried about everything because it all went as smooth as clockwork. Better in fact, but then I probably have Rose to thank for that.

  With the cake finished and the casserole simmering, I took the car and collected Liam and Connor from Millie while Daniel and Leah ate their breakfast. The little boys were quiet on the way back to the cottage, probably because of the last thing Millie said to them as she strapped them into the car. “Be good,” she whispered. “And be quiet, too, because Leah isn’t used to noisy little boys.”

  Although I was pleased about the keeping quiet bit, I just smiled at her. “Don’t worry Millie, they’ll be fine. We will all be fine. You just go and turn those rooms into a home.”

  She straightened up and hugged me. “I’ll never be able to repay you and Daniel. Never!”

  “What nonsense,” I told her as brusquely as I could because I didn’t want tears again, from either of us. I was glad about the hug though.

  Daniel and Leah were waiting for us at the gate. Robbie was there too, looking smarter than usual in new jeans and an open necked shirt instead of his working gear. They both smiled at me and then turned to greet the little boys as they burst excitedly from the car.

  “Wow, this is an ENORMOUS garden,” Liam peered over the gate in awe.

  “It really isn’t,” I said but he stopped listening the moment Daniel swung open the gate to let him through. His brother followed without a word, and in less than a minute the pair of them had disappeared behind the house. I started after them, conscious that they were my responsibility for the rest of the day, but Daniel grabbed my arm.

  “They’ll be fine,” he said. “There’s only one way out of the garden and the fence is secure, so you don’t have to keep them under surveillance all day.”

  “But what if one of them falls over and hurts himself, or a bee stings them or...or…” I knew there were several other catastrophes waiting to happen, I just couldn’t think of one right then.

  Both men la
ughed at me. “They’re searching for bugs,” Robbie said. “Not trekking down the Amazon.”

  I scowled at them. “It’s not funny. What do I know about boys and bugs? This is a really, really bad idea.”

  “No it’s not, it’s a very good idea, and a kind one too,” Daniel handed me Leah and gave us both a swift kiss on the cheek. “I must go or I’ll be late opening up. I’ll be back for all four of you later, and for Ella too if she keeps her promise.”

  I didn’t look at Robbie until the car was just a puff of exhaust in the distance. When I finally plucked up courage he was waiting. “When were you going to tell me?” he said.

  I shook my head. “I wasn’t. I just hoped that when you saw each other again everything would fall into place.”

  “Like a fairytale, you mean. I’m afraid life’s not like that Rachel. What went wrong between Ella and me will need a lot more than a cleverly contrived meeting to put it right.”

  “If that’s the case, then why did you come to Mapleby without telling her?” I asked him. “Was it because you hoped to bump into her oh so casually?”

  He had the grace to look sheepish. “I hadn’t thought of it like that.”

  “Well, now you can. If she comes at all, she’ll go to see Tom first and then she’ll come to the cottage to see me, except I might not be here if she’s late. I might be eating a casserole with Millie and the boys to celebrate them moving into their new home. You can come too if you like because you did most of the work, that’s if you are too much of a coward to stay here and wait for Ella.”

  Given that I was making it up as I went along, it wasn’t a bad challenge. He didn’t buy it though. “I can’t do that, Rachel. She will never forgive me, or you, if we force her into a corner.”